Monthly Archives: September 2016

Tour De Farce



Bradley Wiggins we should’ve known all along

Like Ben Johnson and Lance Armstrong…

To name but a few

Cheats in sport f*** you!

The IKEA Generation



There’s more to us than meatballs, The IKEA generation

“Darling, how they’ve transformed our living room…quite a sensation”

The kitchen, the study, the bedrooms and the bathroom too

Flat packs and potato fritters for breakfast ,IKEA we love you

Say Cheese, Mickey!



Was Mickey Mouse a reluctant star

Or had he planned it all from afar

Minnie Mouse, beauty queen

Together they stole the silver screen

Tripping over the red carpet

with the lavish Hollywood party set

Mickey in tuxedo, Minnie in polka dot dress

Just another celeb couple out to impress

“No Flash photography please!”

“Hey, Mickey, say cheese!”

“And who is it making the real big bucks?”

“is it you and MInnie Or Donald Duck?”

“O.k you really don’t have to answer that”

“But TIME magazine would love to have a chat”

I’ll say it again was Mickey Mouse a reluctant star?

Or did he revel in his lifestyle of champagne and Caviar

The World’s Greatest Lovers++(Written about 1996)



The legendary Casanova

Knew how to bowl a maiden over

But he never went all the way

For, rumour has it he was gay

The Marquis De Sade

Didn’t have to try too hard

Then there was Mike Baldwin

With his fat wallet and cheeky grin

There can’t be many Weatherfield women

Who haven’t been besotted with him

“If I s*** you i won’t brag about it!”

Hardly has the same ring about it

As the eloquent words

So often heard from these 3 men

Living With Bad Architecture



It can’t be easy living with bad architecture

Frank Gehry’s penis extension in Barcelona

And It must be hard

Waking up with the Shard

A “Carbuncle” a  blight on the landscape

A train bound for the country to escape

Living with bad architecture

Grim, imposing buildings

Living with bad architecture

Get that sinking feeling

Living with bad architecture….