Monthly Archives: August 2015

The Rhino Charges Too Much+

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rhino in Africa
The rhino charges too much
And Eastend record shops, so out of touch
The Rhino Charges too much
Just like WHSmith
The rhino charges too much
Bargains in Whitechapel, that’s a myth
The rhino charges too much…An endangered species is the rhino
Like the affordable Off license…Shouldn’t exploit the “Wino”
The rhino charges too much, he’s got the horn
In Brighton they charge too much for lesbo porn
The rhino charges too much, attacks the B.B.C
And they attack you too with the rip off license fee
The rhino charges too much…To reason, he won’t listen
Just like all those publicans,the dearest beer in Britain
The rhino charges too much, he must have his fun
The rhino charges too much, but he’s not the only one!
+ guide antagonises a black rhino

Brucie Bonus

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brucie bonus
what happened to you Steve?
In you,’though, i still believe
Piling on the pounds in Hull
And they  sacked you as well
Signed from the “Canaries”…Came from Gillingham
That’s in Kent isn’t it, used to be fit, used to be slim
Should’ve played for England, not that shit Terry…
and Cahill, had so much skill, lifted trophies at Wembley
Steve Bruce brilliant with your head at both ends
Come back to Salford Steve, where you still have friends
Steve Bruce
Dangerous, when let loose
In the opposition box
had your setbacks and your knocks
Your style of leadership, we’ve been missin’
But it seems like you’ve been eating the skin off the chicken!
Steve Bruce preferred you in your heyday
Steve Bruce loved the way you play…
I too, wear my heart on my sleeve
What happened to you Steve?

Patty Hearst’s Daughter

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patty hearst's daughter
Patty Hearst
Got their first….a real trail blazer
And her daughter, no “Shrinking Violet” either
The Peanut farmer
Jimmy Carter…
sprang her from jail….”Stockholm Syndrome”
Her “Glamour puss” has found a home
all over
the cover of glossy magazines
Patty Hearst’s daughter
Whatever mom taught her…
worked like a dream…
Patty Hearst’s daughter
Raising blood pressure
in men young and old
Patty Hearst’s daughter
tone down the racy look, she ought a
“Angel Of The Centrefold”
+ J.Geils band