Monthly Archives: March 2012

The World and Jilly

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Copyright to ebay.co.uk

In the Amazon, trees, they keep fellin’
and Jilly Cooper’s shit books keep sellin’
Nations keep marchin’ off to war
and Jilly Cooper’s shit books sell more
Swine flu pandemic and famine…a blight on the world’s health
meanwhile Jilly Cooper’s shit books are flyin’ off the shelf
So much sufferin’ in the world. In India the lepers plight ignored
But you can always read a Jilly Cooper novel, if you want to be bored
need I say more

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A Turbulent and Somewhat Tragic Decade

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Copyright to boston.com

The Global Recession
Breivik’s massacre in Oslo
Amy Winehouse dying in her 20s
The Arab Spring
The London Riots, a year before the Olympics
The News of the World phone hacking scandal
Who could ever forget the years from 2001 to 2011
I know I never will…

The Basque Country

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Copyright to best-beaches.com

Bilbao, Bilbao, wonderful Bilbao
How I wish I was walkin’ your clean streets now
The friendly welcome that you’re sure to recieve there
The sort of scenery to make you want to stand and stare
The Athletic Bilbao football stadium was great
and for the lovely Old Town, I simply couldn’t wait
The Guggenheim Museum deserves a mention
For it holds a certain fascination
The delights of Rioja wine
and San Sebastien sure is fine
with its stunning beach
within easy reach…of San Mames coach station, Bilbao
A place to forget your worries and your woes
Just sit back and go with the flow
how easy it is to fall in love with the basque country.

The Gardener

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Copyright to sushwapnews.com

The gardener plants his seeds, nurtures them, waters them, watches them grow
Waits patiently as they turn into flowers or potatoes
Weeds, however, are a different kettle of fish
To rid the world of them, would be every gardener’s wish!
If he can keep the cat off his tomato plants
and at the village fete, his melons might stand a chance
Last year, he came second
To Bill Smith, a legend!
Soon he’s able to enjoy the fruits of his labour
He sits down with a bowl of vegetable soup and his neighbour
“Well Joe, that was simply divine!”
“Go down well with a glass of elderflower wine”
“It’s all organic, Fred as well”
“What’s not eaten, I intend to sell…
at the market, for a reasonable price”
“And if the cabbages come through this year, it’ll be nice”
Fred returns home to the “Archers”
Joe’s more than happy with the life of a gardener…

Wayne’s World

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Copyright to nhlsnipers.com

Has there ever been a better exponent of ice hockey
Than the fantastic, the legendary, Wayne Gretzky
I doubt it very much…
and Wayne Rooney’s subtle touch
He knows how to caress a football…”The White Pele” has it all
Is not put off by man marking or a well organized wall
Wayne Gretzky and Wayne Rooney
are heroes, not zeroes…

The David Bowie Fan Club

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While Ole Solskjaer’s busy, bein’ a supersub
One man just wanted to be in the “Bowie” fanclub
Jock from Dumbarton
who swapped his tartan
for the classic “Ziggy” look
Bought the “Diamond Dogs” tour book
He must have seen “Just a Gigolo” 20 times
Had a pair of platform boots, the most heinous of crimes!
“Bowie” souvenirs adorned the walls of his home
He memorised the lyrics from “Fame” to “The Laughing Gnome”
His uncle set the standard when he scaled “Everest”
But Jock was happy with the “Heroes” tattoo on his chest
Sadly, none of the local girls were a tad impressed
“That’s old hat! It’s the radical age now”
So he ditched his obsession
focused on the recession
and went and bought a plough!